Over-50

Aging & Drinking Too Much? Maybe Get Religion (so to speak)

"According to a Rand Corp. survey of 1,540 adults, the number of days in which Americans drank rose 14% during a month-long period in the spring of 2020, compared with the same period in 2019. In a February American Psychological Association poll of 3,013 adults, 23% reported drinking more to cope with stress during the pandemic." - anne Tergesen, "A Sober Curious Movement Builds Online, Targeting 'Gray Area' Drinking," in The Wall Street Journal, October 3, 2021.

Like any pleasurable activity, such as downing Doritos in front of the screen, drinking alcohol can become a habit tough to shake.

If determined, just as with those who were once chubby and now aren't, that can be done. But most will probably be stuck in euphoric recall of the satisfaction of the experience and head back into indulging in a bit of boozing. Or a lot more than that.

The danger, of course, is the habit can become a compulsion. Then, we're talking about a drinking problem. Those tend to escalate with aging, especially after retirement. 

Some who recognize they're in that danger zone stop on their own. They realize at risk could be their earning capacity, family life, and health. 

On the Eastern European side of my family, which seems to have a gene for alcoholism, most members had that moment of clarity and stopped the disease DIY.

Others such as myself sought out a 12-step program. That was way back in 1981. There wasn't much else available. It was effective. But the approach is inefficient. Currently I would seek out something less time-consuming and less embedded with orthodoxies. 

Today, of course, as the WJD discusses, there are alternate treatment modalities. And a number of them are available online. 

This is strictly anecdotal. In consulting with experts in alcoholism and with being a sponsor of those starting out on their recovery journey this is often considered a key variable in success: belief in the process. The approach didn't matter all that much. What did was, well, blind faith. That's why it can be counterproductive to present a newbie with "evidence" of the flaws in a program. 

Maybe that's why so many sobering-up stories contain phrases like "getting religion" or "a spiritual experience."

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Pre-Retirement/Semiretirement Jitters - I Lost Plenty Today in Stock Market

Aging has the usual challenges, of course. Those range from losing family and friends to having to get serious about nutrition and exercise. 

But added to that is the reality that we could outlive our money - at least enough to maintain a comfortable lifestyle.

Today that reality turned brutal. If you are like me you watched the numbers in your investments going down. That could mean that I will have to continue to take on more communications/coaching assignments over the next four years than I had planned. 

Actually that scheduled retirement date might have to be shelved. I may never be able to hang it up. 

All this uncertainty seems analogous to when I finished my formal education. I had no idea what was next. That shook me to the core. Obviously, I did find my way to a career path. But the memory remains vivid of how awful it felt not to have solid ground under my feet. 

If you want to share your story of navigating these strange times, please send it to janegenova374@gmail.com. You can submit it with your identity or anonymously. It will be posted on this blog. 

The Great Resignation - Hey, We Baby Boomers Were There Before in the Counterculture

"During the pandemic, many knowledge workers have been embracing career downsizing, voluntarily reducing their work hours to emphasize other aspects of life." - Cal Newport, "Why Are So Many Knowledge Workers Quitting?" in The New Yorker, August 16, 2021.

First, let's get something straight.

What's being called The Great Resignation represents just one movement in America.

Simultaneously, BigLaw firm Latham & Watkins has been able to hire 274 lateral associates to crank out the overload of client demand, putting in 100-hour weeks.

Goldman Sachs and Jeffries have boosted their compensation for entry-level jobs to $110,000 (with only a BA or BS) so that there will continue to be takers for the same 100-hour weeks.

And, new money is taking over the Hamptons. 

But, The Great Resignation or career downshifting is a movement. It has traction.

To accommodate the fewer hours knowledge workers are willing to put in, some are adopting what is called a "minimalist lifestyle." For example, a former BigLaw paralegal I had coached had traded off purchasing top-of-the-line brands for not waking up in the morning with a knot in her stomach. As yet, she hasn't found another way of earning a living. But she figures that won't be hard because she isn't looking for big money. 

There is that adage: Nothing is new under the sun. No, this movement isn't new.

Baby boomers like myself recall the same renunciation of too-demanding careers, embrace of cheap living (including dumpster diving), and the focus on personal pleasure in the counterculture. Before we were legal to drink alcohol, we had burned out from all we had to do to "get into good schools," get excellent grades, and make it our business to marry spouses useful for upward mobility. 

Also, way before the counterculture, as author of the New Yorker article Newport emphasizes, there had been the ethos of Henry Thoreau. He had his followers in the 19th century, as well as liberal arts students up until the present time. 

Where could this all be leading? That could be the creation of The Great Divide. Two kinds of careers.

Reasonable ones, like the kind Jim Anderson on "Father Knows Best" enjoyed. He was not only home for dinner every night. He was also emotionally there.

There will also be the unreasonable ones. The paralegal told me the story of the wife who comes to the law office to talk with her husband. He's not there. He had flown to London on business, with no time to let the family know.

Both groups could become smug about their choices. 

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Back in the Counterculture, No, We Didn't Do the Math

Adam Neumann's super-octane pitch to constituencies ranging from employees to clients renting office space from WeWork was this: You are being part of something important.

That something important was that WeWork had created a holistic approach to living.

It was that instead of the old work/balance cliche work would be totally integrated into a life. The model established by WeWork made that happen. People would work side-by-side, socialize, grow from their interactions and not be in-silos such as the traditional offices and cubicles. The cool term Newmann used for that was "community."

That same force field of being part of something important could be driving youth to law school. After all the profession is a game-changer. At Sanford Heisler, David Sanford has put employers, including law firms, on notice to treat all kinds of employees without discrmination. The work lawyers do make headlines. Both the prosecution and the defense in "U.S. v. Elizabeth Holmes" will be household names when jury selection begins on August 31st. And, from "Perry Mason" to Dick Wolf's new series "For the Defense," legal matters are pillars in pop culture.

For the opportunity to do something important, the JD Class of 2024, which is overbooked in 55% of law schools, will likley pick up $145k in student loan debt. In 2019, their average annual salary will be around $80k. Do the math. That isn't great, especially since interest keeps increasing. 

But we human beings don't do the math we we feel we are doing something important. Members of the military work for peanuts. During the countculture of the late 1960s and early 1970s, I operated in the front lines w/o payment. And, mothers never expect compensation. 

The tragic irony, as with those who looped into WeWork, is that all too often the something might not be important. Actually, it could be a con. Mankind seems to be Myth-Making Animal.

We Baby Boomers Who Weren't Ambitious Enough - Maybe That Is Becoming OK

"In a Hybrid Office, Remote Workers Will Be Left Behind - It may not be fair, but in-office employees will get more attention—and more promotions. Blame it on human nature." - Peter Cappelli, The Wall Street Journal, August 13, 2021

Articles on the career drawbacks of WFH usually miss the boat: They don't get it that there are many who just want to make a living - on their own terms. That is, they want to do the work. And do it well enough to keep the job or the assignment. No, they don't aim for anything higher - or even different. They have families. They have hobbies. They like watching "Law & Order" reruns while they do their tasks. End of story.

No, not everyone is an ambitious careerist. However, at this time, we who are essentially craftspeople who love what we are doing and don't want to "climb the ladder" are an enigma in American capitalism. "They," probably even those close to us, don't understand us.

Yet, the reality is that professional life often becomes the corridor of pain. Needlessly so. 

That associates in a law firm making all the supposed right moves, including getting the attention of management, don't make partner. I have yet to coach any of those who could shake that trauma.

Wouldn't they have been better off if they simply approached practicing law in a large elite law firm as a way to make a good living? Not make partner? Then transfer that background to another career path?  With that mindset, they can opt for a total remote arrangement, get the money, get the experience, and than go on from there. In these volatile times we are all going on from there. 

What could play out from this global upheaval of versions of COVID is a rethinking of ambition. The extreme kind.

Not unthinkable is that a shift could become standard at the top of organizations. Instead of businesses considering raw ambition as a plus, they develop the norm of recruiting and even developing those who are quite satisfied to do the job well. Not rise in the ranks. After all, the ambitious can be a pest in the workplace. Compulsively they are scanning the horizon trying to catch up with opportunity. Also, they could be planning a coup to grab the positions of superiors.

The cliche memes about reaching for the stars could be replaced by: Making a living at what won't kill you or turn you mean. Soon enough WFH will lose all stigma. And the WSJ won't deliver stern warnings about how it holds a career back. Anyway, Willis Towers Watson projects the end of careers. They will be replaced by developing a portfolio of portable skills and experiences. 

 Disclosure: Since 1987, I have been WFH.

Let’s talk about success. On your own terms. How can you boost that in your own career and the trajectory of your business? You owe yourself a complimentary consultation janegenova374@gmail (no selling).

Baby Boomers - Remember Our Dumpster Diving in the Name of the People!

This does not underestimate the brutal need of the current poor who can only survive through dumpster-diving. Some of us try to make their daily runs easier by leaving outside the dumpster what they could use. That frees them up from digging through or even having to leap in.

But, that's only one version of dumpster diving.

Another is the political. 

During the counterculture we who abandoned a suburban ethos for a minimalist lifestyle dumpster dived as a political statement. The objective was to send the message that you didn't need a job in General Motors (our base in the revolution was Ann Arbor, Michigan) to meet your basic needs. In addition, we participated in operating coops: Take what you need, leave what you don't. Donate a couple of bucks. As for other necessities of life such as medical care and psychotherapy (we were the first therapy generation) there were free clinics. 

Habits die hard. What was placed outside dumpsters in this small town I have picked up to furniture my new home. The finds range from a high chair for my elevated meditation table to a few lamps (they work). No political statements, this time around. Just a quick eye for what is free to take. Should I feel guilt that I might have denied the really-down-and-out what they could use? 

Where politics has taken on a social-networking signature is with the dumpster diving in Mahattan of influencer Anna Sacks. The Guardian covers her daily trash walk. Her activist message is that we are a throw-away culture. A subtext is how much organizations waste. She videos her journey and collections and posts them on social networks such as Instagram.

Will Sacks be able to accomplish ESG Moments and encourage business to recycle rather than toss? For example, she showcased a hairbrush that, if sterilized, could be given to those who need one.

Sacks is a hero of our times. But, unlike the era of the counterculture, her activist message might not have reach.

Let’s talk about success. How can you boost that in your own career and the trajectory of your business? You owe yourself a complimentary consultation janegenova374@gmail (no selling).

Thirtysomethings and Boomers - What We Have in Common

Sure, business leadership, you can contract with consultants to brief you on the thirtysomethings in your offices.

What you're already hearing from the media is that they are burned out, critical of the culture and know they have other options. The most talented might have already have hit the exits. 

But, a more intimate introduction to the thirtysomething is through the new book "But You're Still So Young: How Thirtysomethings Are Redefining Adulthood." The author is seasoned journalist Kayleen Schaefer. Her publication credits range from Vanity Fair to The New York Times. Just released in March 2021, it ranks high on Amazon. She herself is a thirtysomething.

Essentially the "story" of the thirtysomething generation, as it unfolds in "Still So Young," is one of expectations not happening.

On the one hand, in their rear view mirror they see the ethos of the 1950s.

That was not only a more simple time.

The rites of passage were predictable and occurred on-time: education, career, marriage, American dream of home ownership and family. They want some of that. Of course, that linear sequence is not easily put together in the volatile 21st century. Among the landmines along that once-standard path have been three economic downturns, dominance of the gig work model and student loan debt. 

On the other hand, they are discovering it is exciting to try out new approaches to everything from launching a career to finding connection. That, some psychologists speculate, has prevented their becoming developmental delayed. All the newness had been keeping their brains "plastic."

Obviously, most have experienced hard times, both financial and emotional. Overall, finally, they sense they are finding their way. That's through mapping out their own unique journey. All likely realize, though, they are not out of those woods yet. Some of those who assumed they had achieved financial stability had the rug pulled out from them by COVID. Too many are still living home with their family. COVID increased that number. 

Riding that rollercoaster has shaped the thirtysomethings not to be willing to buy into the configuration of traditional career paths. Another lesson is not listening to the perceptions of others about what they "should do."

For instance, they have been disappointed too much to bank, literally, on the assumption that extreme hard work and conformity to organizational values will bring X or Y reward. That hurt is so raw that they are willing to accept a pay cut to make a living according to who they are and what they can get out bed in the morning to do. In the book is the up and down and up again chronicle of Marcus. 

The author herself questions the fierce all-work ethic she had embraced when working at Yahoo. Parent Verizon is currently exploring the sale of Yahoo, reports The Wall Street Journal.

The culture of many businesses doesn't fit well with this generation. That could become a problem in recruiting and retaining young talent.

Reflection: In the downsizing of Corporate America at the end of the 1980s, we exiled middle managers also had that same moment of clarity current thirtysomethings have had soon after college: We couldn't buy into what was then still referred to as "the system." We boomers had to figure out on our own how to make a good living. All that career advice we paid for ... Haha.

Small changes can trigger big success in your career and your business communications. Swing by for a complimentary consultation (janegenova374@gmail.com)

You're More Confident about a Comfortable Retirement

"About three-quarters of U.S. workers and retirees believe they will have enough money for retirement, an increase from a year ago, according to a survey [sponsored by Employee Benefits Research Institute] released Thursday." - Anne Tergesen, The Wall Street Journal, April 22, 2021.

That research found that 72% of you are reasonably confident that you can retire comfortably.

Essentially, from coaching those over-50, I have discovered that usually means "on your own terms."

For example, you make the personal decision to sell the family house and relocate to Arizona or North Carolina from the New York Metro area.

You know you will be bored without working so you plan to pick up a part-time job or a gig assignment. You might even start a business. Or, you can train for a new line of work such as long-distance truck driver. All that could be very different from your career which has ended. 

You may be embracing your wanderlust and plow a chunk of your savings into purchasing a big RV. 

"On our own terms," though, doesn't necessarily include The Good Life. You likely have become realistic that your choices are more limited in retirement than during your peak-earnings phase of your life. Gone may be the lux vacations and showering grandchildren with pricey gifts. 

A comfortable life plays out the philosophy of "enoughness." You can make ends meet plus having some discretionary income. There's no reason to long for more than that.

As for the search for work, you can download free my guide on that Download Outwitting ageism

Small changes can trigger big success in your career and your business communications. Swing by for a complimentary consultation (janegenova374@gmail.com)

 

The COVID Parenting Penalty - Even Older Mothers Find Circling Back into Labor Market Tough

It was probably the right thing to do for mothers to leave their jobs for childcare during COVID.

But life isn't fair. The dynamics of capitalism can be brutal in America. 

Now, reports Bloomberg Law, mothers are paying a steep price for exiting the labor market.

About two million women haven't yet found their way back.

Others who have usually have taken a haircut on compensation, status and power.

This phenomenon has impacted older mothers also. That is, those over-50. After all, the age at which women begin their families is moving up as they ensure they have established a career path. 

The solution - re-entrying the workforce - might not be pretty. Often to regain momentum requires a step back. Older mothers who have been long-term unemployed might have to reconfigure their job-search materials for positions they assumed they had left behind in their 30s. Then, they have to be alert to how they can pivot back to where they could be again. 

That's essentially what I recommend to most professionals over-50 who have lost their jobs. The winning playbook is to get back in the game, then make your moves from that concrete position of strength. No, you can't settle in. 

One model for how to play that new game is presented in my career guide for the aging. It's free to download Download Outwitting ageism. 

Small changes can trigger big success in your career and your business communications. Swing by for a complimentary consultation (janegenova374@gmail.com)

Civilization and Its Discontents - A Job Riding a Horse Throughout Streets of Tombstone, AZ

What's unique about historic Tombstone, Arizona (circa 1877) is that it's not only for tourism. 

It's also for settling in and making Tombstone your forever home. Just like folks have been doing in the once vacation-only Hampstons on Long Island, New York. 

As you walk around Tombstone, you will notice infrastructure.

There are school buildings with signage like "John Wyatt" and "Union High." You bet, there are plenty of those yellow school buses, too. Just like where you re living now and maybe fantasize about putting that address on short time. 

On main drag Allen Street there is a very contemporary art gallery. Operated by volunteers who are members of the Tombstone Association of the Arts, its signature art form is the quilt. 

Those hand-crafted works of art are featured in the gallery, for sale on consignment. The gallery takes 20%. The list prices range from about $250 to about $850. Every February one is raffled off. Tickets are available year round. They go for a buck. Recently, the winner had been based in NY.

If you do relocate to Tombstone and want to exhibit your art - there other mediums in addition to quilts - you first have to join the Association ($20). Then your piece will be juried. If you make the cut, your creation will enjoy plenty of foot traffic.

And ringing around Tombstone are RV parks where guests have obviously hunkered down.

But, no, there weren't too many houses of worship.

Yes, it's possible to make a living in Tombstone. 

Some of the jobs are quirky. For example, there are those dressed in 19th century wild west garb. They ride horses throughout all the streets. Maybe it's staged, maybe it's real. One such dressed man screamed out that a horse had run into him. He looked to be headed to law enforcement. Here's hoping the alleged miscrent won't be hung. 

On the retail front, there are about 100 stores. Most have a specific ethos. Those range from Native American (lots of dream catchers) to guns (including toy ones in holsters).

As for food, of course, serving it is always a way to make ends meet. The creative in that niche has set up cute ice cream fronts. But the fav is the old-fashioned saloon. 

The lodging part consists of 22 motels. 

Tours are plentiful, including when with you being carted around in a stagecoach. No worries, those whose living depends on the stagecoaches provide a white ladder for you to climb up and step into into that mode of transportation.

And, daily, indoors which requires a ticket, there are simulations of gunfignts. 21st century versions of Wyatt Earp and Doc Holliday go at it.

So, as your belly up to the bar at the Doc Hollidays Saloon, you can run what might remain just a fantasy in your head: Relocating the whole family from wherever to this real, operational town in Cochise County, AZ. 

It's 72 miles from big-city Tucson, AZ, 478 miles from San Diego, California and a whopping 2,378 from Manhttan, NY. 

Should you want to play with the fantasy, right on Allen you can swing by the Visitors' Bureau. Along with all the glossy public relations publications about the region, there is a real estate guide. The prices won't bug your eyes out. Cochise is so close to Mexico - and in mindsets, a whole different dimension than Tucson, which is getting expensive with the diaspora from CA.

From the get-go, you will notice that "real estate" is defined broadly in Cochise County. It can mean:

• The RV Park
• Campgrounds
• A traditional house
• A condo
• A mobile home (no stigma)
• An apartment (including in nearby Sierra Vista, Bisbee, Douglas and Benson)
• An efficiency, with an alcove for a full-size bed. Small can be enough
• Somone's couch..

Unlike some areas where the rental market is tight, it's relatively easy to find what you want quickly. That's for two reasons. One is the turnover created by Snowbirds. The other is the in-and-out situation which is standard with the military base nearby.

Given the fluidity, if you want to try out Tombstone for, say a month or six months, it's possible to secure a rental for that. 

Small changes can trigger big success in your career and your business communications. Swing by for a complimentary consultation (janegenova374@gmail.com)